Archive | March, 2012

Tattered covers and sexy cowgirls

28 Mar

On Monday evening we headed down to Lodo (Lower Downtown… check me out with the local lingo!). We took the train and on the way we got given a lecture on the American superbowl by an excitable group of black hipsters. There was something about someone called T-bo or Teebone? and something about a large sum of money changing hands? Safe to say I now understand American football even less than I did to start with! When we got off we took a stroll down 16th and found a bookshop called ‘The Tattered Cover’.

Image

Having read about it in our guide books we went in for a look-see. It’s basically a shop straight out of Harry Potter; Big winged armchairs, shelves heaving with eccentric books on everything from flower pressing through to South American monkeys. Staffed by a giant transsexual and a friendly lady with a withered arm, it was painfully awesome and bohemian. I shall definitely be going again to type on my laptop, buy iced coffees and look refined. Anyway, in the end Dan and I bought a book about Darwin and a guide to Colorado birdspotting. Then, deciding we were all cultured-out, we went to do a bit of birdspotting of a rather different variety… Coyote Ugly, where feminism goes to die!

Image

There’s nothing quite like sitting down for a beer whilst a scantily clad lady in a cowboy hat dances over you and accuses you of staring at her ass… (Mother, father I’m sorry, you raised me better) I felt very out of place and acutely British! With my Darwin book clutched protectively over my lap, I watched the punters pay for bottles of Coors and Bud Light with a side order of verbal abuse. My favourites being ‘Are you guys all here for a team building exercise? Work’s over … get drunk fuckers!!!’ and whilst pouring a glass of water all over the bar in front of a frightened teatotaller ‘hell no H20! I only serve beer pussy!’. It was indeed a change of scene: From looking at books on alpine wildlife with Bach in the background to watching tonic water being squirted to mime female ejaculation in front of a big neon sign reading ‘No cock on the bar’. I loved it! Maybe it’s just because I’m attention seeking and like being flirted with by snakehipped ladies (who’s main goal was to make you spend an extra 20 bucks on a body shot!). I would definitely take any visiting Brits for a night out you simply couldn’t have outside the US.

As an aside: One of the other things I noticed was as well as the redblooded American males eying up the girl-candy there was, surprisingly, a big gay crowd; a Mexican lesbian couple and a stoned gay Thai bloke were also clearly regulars. The Thai bloke in question was a somewhat unwelcome addition in that he was was staring at me and Dan in a way that veered somewhere between pervy and serial rapist. Still it’s cool to see the gay scene mix so easily in what you would expect would be the straightest of places.

Greetings Americans… I come in peace….

11 Mar

<<<<Hello friends/family/interweb!>>>>

My name’s Sacha, and this… is… my blog!

so please make yourself Welcome and have a cuppa

or Bienvenue and have a croissant

or Wilkommen and have a frankfurter

or Pe’el and have a goblet of your enemies’ blood

Why this blog exists: Right, so I’m a Brit, I’ve just moved from London, England (where we drink tea with the queen, wear top hats and have bad teeth) allllllll the way to Denver, Colorado (where everything is made out of hamburgers, liquor and patriotism). Obviously this is a BIG fat adventure and the aim of this blog is to capture the essence of this. It will therefore be a hodgepodge of funny culture shock stuff, irrelevant daily observations, self deprication, the odd youtube video of cats doing funny things to penguins and a great dirty smear of geekery. Also I’m a video editor and science buff so there’ll be a good dash of that too.

Who should read this blog: Well other than my friends and family (who might be interested in following my doings) anyone really. But it might be particularly cool for people looking to move abroad, Brits who like to laugh at Yanks, Yanks who like to laugh at Brits and anyone who falls over a lot and likes to read about other people falling over.

So I guess that’s it for the intro… 😀

-Sacha